Today was a rainy, windy one, but it is calmer now and we never lost power. I attended an all day work related meeting. I drove through the wind and rain to a country B & B to hear people speak about Career Pathways in Adult Education. And I thought about what it would be like to have a more substantial career in my field, and I wondered if I would like that. It doesn’t seem big or romantic enough to be the thing that I do after my man’s cancer. What happened to: my man was diagnosed with cancer so we decided to travel around the world. Instead I’ve got: my man has cancer, so I decided to go back to work. But that’s just Judgy McJudgerson talking.
After the meeting I picked up tired, cranky children and took them to the grocery store where things were not good. Our five year old boy oscillated between standing in the middle of the store arching his back and yelling up at the ceiling, “I have to poo, I have to throw up,” to asking if he could have every sweet junky thing in the place and then completely disintegrating when the answer was no. And amazingly I didn’t even really care. I didn’t get hot and itchy and slightly sweaty. I didn’t even get angry. I was calm, patient, and rational, so I get a gold star.
The kiddos watched a movie and ate dinner in front of the T.V.-a treat for everyone every once in a while.
Tonight my man is at the movies and I have a sappy movie with my name on it. I am going to snuggle in, watch it, and cry. It’s an old comfort I don’t get very often anymore, so I am looking forward to it.
A friend sent me a link to this. And in her words, “hope this doesn’t offend, it’s meant in love and humor.”
Post Script- I wrote this post late last night and was unable to post it because we did loose power. My movie was bad- I didn’t even shed a tear- maybe I didn’t really need a cry after all.