First of all arghhh!!! After not hearing from Dana Farber all week, I finally took the initiative and called today. Dr. B is away at a conference until the 9th. I am amazed that I have to remind a doctor to get back to us with sort of important information.
I recently learned the expression, “don’t assume, it makes an ass out of you and me,” and have been using it a lot since the diagnosis. Don’t assume that doctors are doing what they said they would do, don’t assume that they are communicating with each other etc. etc. Very frustrating. I mean it is cancer- sort of important and in my husband’s case very rare. Show some interest!
It seems unfair to me that you not only have to deal with the cancer but also run around after people. You can’t just sit back and trust that things are being taken care of. You also have to gather information and collect opinions. I want to be told this is the type of cancer -here are the best things to be done about it. I want black and white and cancer seems to be a lot of grey.
Last night my man went to see a naturopath about alternative ways he could be supporting his body in this fight. Even this is not black and white. We had been told by the radiation oncologist that my man shouldn’t take tons of antioxidants because in his words, “let’s be clear I am trying to damage your body.”
Our naturopath assured my husband that there are different types of antioxidants and that these (in the R-Blend) activate cancer cells to die. We are waiting for a second opinion on this as well. Maybe it is because we are new to this, but it feels like every decision is a life and death one. It is a lot of pressure and added stress, one thing we don’t need. You would think the cancer world could come together to try and eliminate added stress in patients’ lives. Sloan Kettering has an integrative medicine department but I found their information to be vague.
My guy had the hugest sweet tooth of anyone I have ever known. The kind of man who sits down and devourers half a pie in one sitting. He hasn’t had any sweets since his diagnosis. He stills feels like it isn’t enough. He has been told to give up alcohol as well and today I bought him some non-alcoholic beer. He worried that even that has sugar. I told him that he has made incredible changes in his habits and should be proud. He has to find a path that he can follow comfortably. I seem to have found one for now. A balance between being proactive and cancer oriented and also living my life.
My son and I had a play date this morning and the sun came out for the first time in days. Tomorrow I am going to see Sex in the City with some girl friends. Hopefully over the course of the weekend we will get answers to some of our lingering questions. This is my own version of integrative medicine.